Jungle Boogie: Ed Wood’s THE BRIDE AND THE BEAST (Allied Artists 1958)

Reincarnation and past lives were popular themes in the 1950’s, mainly because of the success of THE SEARCH FOR BRIDEY MURPHY, which spawned a host of imitators. One of these was THE BRIDE AND THE BEAST, a bizarre take on the theme written by the legendary (for all the wrong reasons!) Edward D. Wood, Jr. In this incarnation of the reincarnation subject, we find a pretty young bride who improbably discovers she was once a fierce jungle gorilla!

Big Game Hunter Lance Fuller and his new wife Charlotte Austin are honeymooning at his stately manor. She finds out he’s keeping a gorilla named Spanky in the basement to be shipped to a zoo, and gets a ‘sinister urge’ (sorry!) to see it. Charlotte goes ape over Spanky, and he obviously digs her, too. But worried Lance warns her to keep her paws off the big ape because he’s dangerous.

Later that night, Spanky escapes his cage and fondles our young bride, ripping off her nightie, so jealous Lance shoots the hairy horndog! Charlotte keeps having dreams about Africa, and can’t shake the feeling she’s lived before, so an eminent psychologist (and really, is there any other kind in these movies?) is called in to hypnotize her. Under hypnosis, Charlotte rambles on about one of Ed Wood’s favorite subjects, angora fur: “so soft like a kitten’s fur… it felt so good on me, as if it belonged there”. Ahem, okay…

The couple head to The Dark Continent so Lance can bag some big game, with their faithful houseboy/guide Taro (who speaks in a stilted Brooklyn accent!) in tow. Lance goes traipsing off among the stock footage of wild animals, while Charlotte discovers the animals fear her – because she was once Queen of the Gorillas! And by the way, do Great White Hunters usually change into their pajamas while sleeping in their jungle tents, or wear their sneakers when traversing the jungle veldt (asking for a friend)? Anyway, some Indian tigers have escaped from a cargo ship and are on the loose, attacking Charlotte before Lance kills them, and while she’s recuperating, she somehow (don’t ask me how!) summons a gorilla into camp, and the beast KO’s Lance and carries Charlotte off into the jungle where she belongs!

“It felt so good on me… ” – Ed Wood with Dolores Fuller in 1953’s “Glen or Glenda?” (Ed’s on the right!)

Yep, that’s definitely an Ed Wood story, all right! But Ed didn’t direct THE BRIDE AND THE BEAST – that honor went to producer Adrian Weiss, in his only time sitting in the director’s chair (he’d been working as a writer, editor, production manager, and assistant director since the 1930’s). Weiss isn’t bad, but I would’ve loved to have seen what Ed Wood could have done with a slightly larger budget than usual. Not much larger, mind you, but at least the sets don’t look like they’ll come crashing down on the actor’s heads at any given moment!!

Star Lance Fuller is perhaps best known for his turn as the big-foreheaded alien Brack in THIS ISLAND EARTH, played in CATTLE QUEEN OF MONTANA with Barbara Stanwyck and Ronald Reagan, costarred in Roger Corman’s APACHE WOMEN, and was once married to blonde bombshell Joi Lansing. Pretty Charlotte Austin should have had a bigger career, but besides small parts in DADDY LONG LEGS and HOW TO BE VERY VERY POPULAR, and a bigger one in Frankenstein 1970 , she went nowhere. A pair of Hollywood’s top gorilla-suited actors are featured here: Ray “Crash” Corrigan and Steve Calvert .

So while THE BRIDE AND THE BEAST may be silly, it’s perfect Saturday matinee fare, and kids of all ages will go ape over it, as will all you Ed Wood completists out there – and count me among them! I’d never seen it before, but now it’s available all this month on The Film Detective, and if you aren’t familiar with them yet, just follow this link… and tell ’em Cracked Rear Viewer sent you!

 

Boulevard of Broken Dreams: Quentin Tarantino’s ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD (Sony/Columbia 2019)

If you’re as much of a movie/television/pop culture fanatic as I am (and if you weren’t, you probably wouldn’t be reading this blog!), I’m here to tell you you’re gonna ABSOLUTELY FUCKING LOVE this latest Quentin Tarantino epic!

ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD takes place in 1969, at the tail end of Tinseltown’s Glory Days, and the tail end of TV actor Rick Dalton’s career. Dalton (splendidly played by Leonardo DiCaprio) was the star of the late 50s/early 60s TV Western BOUNTY LAW (modeled after Steve McQueen’s WANTED: DEAD OR ALIVE), whose drinking problem has led him on the road to nowheresville, grabbing quick paychecks by guest starring as bad guys on episodic TV. He’s offered the chance to make some low-budget Spaghetti Westerns by producer Marvin Schwarsz (a bloated looking Al Pacino), bottom of the barrel stuff that’ll keep Rick’s name above the title.

Rick’s best bud Cliff Booth (supercool Brad Pitt – and why hasn’t this guy won a fucking acting Oscar yet?) is his long-time stunt double who has problems of his own getting work, due to rumors he killed his wife with a spear gun. Rick gets some new neighbors at his private Ciello Drive residence: upcoming starlet Sharon Tate (an endearing Margot Robbie) and her new hubby, director Roman Polanski. He also lands yet another bad guy role on the pilot episode of LANCER (featuring Timothy Olyphant as the tragic James Stacy), but Cliff’s not hired because of friction with stunt co-ordinator Randy’s (the great Kurt Russell) wife (veteran stuntwoman and actress Zoe Bell).

So while Rick struggles with himself making the pilot, Cliff picks up a cute teenage hitchhiker (Margaret Qualley, Emmy winner for FOSSE/VERDON) and drives her to the Spahn Ranch, and their lives will never be the same…

I won’t spoil the ending for you, except to say it hits you like a swift kick in the balls, and another, and then another, in typically over-the-top Tarantino fashion – all set to the music of Vanilla Fudge’s “You Keep Me Hangin’ On”! As usual, music plays a large part in Tarantino’s film, and you’ll hear classic rock tunes from the era like Los Bravos’ “Bring a Little Water”, Bob Seger’s “Rambling Gambling Man”, The Stones’ ‘Out of Time”, Deep Purple’s “Hush”, and many others. You’ll even hear and see the impossibly handsome Robert Goulet crooning “MacArthur Park” from an old TV clip!

DiCaprio and Pitt make a great pair as Rick and Cliff, a couple of Hollywood losers now living on the fringe of filmdom. And Margot Robbie is just as lovable as the real Sharon Tate – she inhabits the late actress’s skin and truly BECOMES the doomed star. Besides those previously mentioned, I’d be remiss if I didn’t give shout-outs to Bruce Dern as the broken-down George Spahn (a role slated for Burt Reynolds before his death), Austin Butler (Nickelodeon’s ZOEY 101) as the thoroughly evil Tex Watson, Dakota Fanning as Squeaky Fromme, Nicholas Hammond (TV’s original SPIDER-MAN) as director Sam Wannamaker, and Emile Hirsch (INTO THE WILD) as Jay Sebring. Luke Perry makes his final film appearance as actor Wayne Maunder, and Lena Dunham, Martin Kove, Michael Madsen, and James Remar are also along for this wild ride!

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There’s so much to love for film fans in ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD, and I especially dug the scene where Pitt’s character has a fight with Bruce Lee, played by martial arts expert Mike Moh. The “clip” of DiCaprio singing while hosting the rock music TV show HULLABALOO resonated with me, and fans will get the reference when Olyphant-as-Stacy leaves the set on his motorcycle. A lot of online critics are complaining that the film isn’t up to the auteur’s par, but I call bullshit on that… ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD is vintage Tarantino, an ode to Old Hollywood that’s a movie buff’s dream. It’s 2 and 1/2 hour running time flew by, and by all means, go see it! You can thank me later!

Fondly dedicated to the memory of Sharon Tate (1943-1969)

End of the Trail: James Stewart in Anthony Mann’s THE MAN FROM LARAMIE (Columbia 1955)

I’ve covered several of the  Anthony Mann/James Stewart Western collaborations here. Their final sagebrush outing together THE MAN FROM LARAMIE was shot in Cinemascope and gorgeous Technicolor, features a bunch of solid character actors, has beautiful New Mexico scenery… yet felt like a letdown to me. Maybe it’s because Mann and Stewart set the bar so high in their previous Westerns, but THE MAN FROM LARAMIE is an anti-climactic climax to the director/star duo’s pairings.

Stewart’s good as always, playing bitter Will Lockhart, whose brother was killed by Apaches and whose mission is to find out who’s selling the guns to them. But the film came off flat, feeling like just another routine Western – good, but not in the same category as WINCHESTER ’73 or BEND OF THE RIVER. Those Mann film noir touches are nowhere to be found, replaced by (dare I say it!)… soap opera elements!

Cathy O’Donnell, so good as Wilma in William Wyler’s THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES and Keechie in Nick Ray’s THEY LIVE BY NIGHT , is not-so-good here as love interest Barbara. Granted, the part is underwritten by scenarists Philip Yordan and Frank Burt, as are most of the characters, reduced to mere cardboard cutouts. Even the great Donald Crisp struggles to make something out of mean ranch owner Alec Waggoman. Arthur Kennedy does okay as ranch foreman (and nominal villain) Vic Hansboro, but Alex Nicol is lousy as hot-headed Waggoman son Dave. Wallace Ford seems to be channeling Gabby Hayes as Stewart’s cantankerous sidekick Charley. Only Aline MacMahon as salty rival rancher Kate (“I’ve patched up bullet holes in places I wouldn’t like to mention”) and young Jack Elam as conniving town drunk Chris Boldt manage to create fleshed-out characters – and Elam’s killed off early!

On the plus side, Charles Lang’s cinematography is outstanding, with some truly breathtaking shots of New Mexico’s scenic vistas, enhanced by that previously mentioned Cinemascope and Technicolor. The film can also be violent and bloodily brutal in places, with some incredibly tough stunt work from pros like Bill Catchings, Ted Mapes, and Chuck Roberson. But let’s be honest – when I start talking about the background and stuntmen, you know I don’t have a lot to say about the film! It just doesn’t have that special “something” that set apart the other Mann/Stewart Westerns. Instead, it’s just another 50’s oater.

Anthony Mann directing Jimmy Stewart in 1953’s “Thunder Bay” (that’s costar Dan Duryea in the background)

Anthony Mann and James Stewart were scheduled to team again for 1957’s NIGHT PASSAGE, but Mann backed out over the casting of Audie Murphy as Jimmy’s outlaw kid brother. Mann claimed Stewart just wanted an excuse to play his accordion in a movie, and a rift developed between the two that never healed. NIGHT PASSAGE is more reminiscent of their work together than THE MAN FROM LARAMIE, a mediocre Western that completists will want to see…  the rest of us can just go back and enjoy THE NAKED SPUR or WINCHESTER ’73 once again.

 

 

 

Ho Daddy! Surf’s Up!: FOR THOSE WHO THINK YOUNG (United Artists 1964)

Kowabunga! The success of 1963’s BEACH PARTY begat a deluge of Teen Beach Flicks, loaded with sand, sun, and surf, not to mention babes in bikinis, sturdy, studly boys, and rock’n’roll music. And while the Frankie & Annette/AIP sequels have a charm of their own, most of the imitators ranged from fairly okay (IT’S A BIKINI WORLD ) to pretty mediocre (CATALINA CAPER) to downright bad (WILD ON THE BEACH) . FOR THOSE WHO THINK YOUNG falls into the first category, thanks to a lively cast headed by heartthrobs James Darren and Pamela Tiffin, and a slew of Familiar Faces from movies and TV.

Just don’t expect Shakespeare or anything like that, because FOR THOSE WHO THINK YOUNG is as harmless a piece of movie fluff as you’ll ever come across! The plot is so simple even I could’ve come up with it: all the sorority girls are going ga-ga over rich, handsome young stud ‘Ding’ Prescott, but he only has eyes for pretty Sandy Palmer, who has no use for the charming rascal. Despite all his silly romantic machinations, ‘Ding’ can”t get to first base with this ice-cold coed.

Meanwhile, Sandy’s “uncles” Woody and Sid turn local hangout Surf’s Up into the swingingest place in town, thanks to Woody’s comedy talents and sexy dancer Topaz McQueen (and with a name like Topaz McQueen, she’d better be sexy!). The college, led by board member and ‘Ding’s’ grandpa Buford Cronin,  gets in an uproar over rumors of underage drinking and “hanky panky” going on, and send prim (but equally sexy!) professor Pamela Swanson to investigate. Everything finally comes to a head (as they usually do in these films) when they try to shut down Surf’s Up, and Grandpa is discovered to be an ex-bootlegger named ‘Nifty’ Cronin (nicknames must run in the family), the surfing college kids (who don’t go to a lot of classes, by the way) blackmail him, and ‘Ding’ and Sandy finally get it on… er, I mean get together!

Star James Darren has always been a personal favorite of mine. He made his film debut in the low budget RUMBLE ON THE DOCKS (alongside Robert Blake and Timothy Carey ), was the original Moondoggie in 1959’s GIDGET, had the lead in the underrated LET NO MAN WRITE MY EPITAPH, costarred in the hit THE GUNS OF NAVARONE, and acted for Jess Franco in VENUS IN FURS. His TV resume includes Irwin Allen’s brief but memorable THE TIME TUNNEL , three seasons as William Shatner’s sidekick on TJ HOOKER , and hologram Vic Fontaine on STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE (and don’t forget his turn as the animated ‘Jimmy Darrock’ on an episode of THE FLINTSTONES!). Darren also had a couple of minor rock hits, including the theme from “Gidget”, “Goodbye Cruel World”, and “Her Royal Majesty”. As of this writing, James Darren is alive and well at age 83, and still performs on occasion, to the delight of his many fans!

Pamela Tiffin was groomed to be a big star, in big films like SUMMER AND SMOKE, Billy Wilder’s ONE TWO THREE, STATE FAIR, and COME FLY WITH ME, but the beautiful young actress marched to her own drumbeat, and left Hollywood behind to marry Italian Edmondo Danon and move to the Continent, where she continued to act in Italian films until her retirement (Ms. Tiffin is also still with us at age 79). TV host Woody Woodbury (WHO DO YOU TRUST?) plays her “Uncle Woody”, and his smarmy, 60’s-style sex’n’booze jokes are kinda archaic and corny… yet I still found myself laughing at them! Another 60’s favorite, the sarcastic Paul Lynde , plays “Uncle Sid”.

Sexy Topaz McQueen is none other than sexy Tina Louise, who played sexy movie star Ginger Grant on GILLIGAN’S ISLAND. And Gilligan himself, Bob Denver, is on hand as ‘Ding’s’ beatnik buddy Kelp! Character actor Robert Middleton (THE DESPERATE HOURS, LOVE ME TENDER) plays ‘Ding’s’ ex-bootlegger Grandpa. A young Ellen McRae is the prudish professor; she later changed her name to Ellen Burstyn and won an Oscar for ALICE DOESN’T LIVE HERE ANYMORE. And the daughters of Hollywood royalty make their film debuts as coeds Karen and Sue… Nancy Sinatra and Claudia Martin, Frank and Dino’s kids!

I mentioned “a slew of Familiar Faces” earlier, and this is the main reason film buffs will want to catch this lightweight little time waster: stars from the worlds of film and television like (take a deep breath!) Robert Armstrong (in his last film appearance), Benny Baker, Lada Edmond Jr (HULLABALOO’s top go-go dancer, later a successful stuntwoman), the ubiquitous Bess Flowers , vaudeville vet Mousie Garner, Susan Hart (THE GHOST IN THE INVISIBLE BIKINI), perennial screen gangsters Allen Jenkins and Jack LaRue , Anna Lee (as Darren’s mom), Michael Nader (DYNASTY’s Dex Dexter), Louis Quinn (Roscoe on 77 SUNSET STRIP), the one-and-only George Raft (as a cop!), character actorAddison Richards, Roger Smith (another 77 SUNSET STRIP alum and hubby of Ann-Margret), and Sammee Tong all appear in small roles.

Far as beach movies go, FOR THOSE WHO THINK YOUNG doesn’t have a lot of music in it; there’s a folk rock-type tune in there somewhere, the title track sung by Darren, and a weird little novelty number by Bob Denver called “Ho Daddy, Surf’s Up”…

    …what it does have a plethora of (besides all those Familiar Faces) is a ton of product placement! You see, FOR THOSE WHO THINK YOUNG was the early 60’s advertising slogan for Pepsi-Cola, to try and differentiate the brand from rival Coca-Cola by declaring it the soft drink of choice for the tanned and trim teen set. And Pepsi is literally everywhere in this film! Pepsi cans, Pepsi bottles, Pepsi vending machines… hell, I’m getting bloated just thinking about it! Be that as it may, this is a fun if inconsequential little beach entry that I’d recommend for the presence of James Darren, Pamela Tiffin, and all those Familiar Faces we movie and TV fans love to watch. So go on, crack open another Pepsi *burrrp* and give it a whirl. Surf’s up, dudes and dudettes!

RIP Pumpsie Green

Most people these days think of Boston (and the Northeast as a whole) as a modern Athens, the standard bearer for progressive, liberal thinking. But it wasn’t always so. The City of Boston in the 1950’s and 60’s was a hotbed of racial tensions, with frequent rioting over such issues as forced busing and integration. While Jackie Robinson was the first black player to break the Major League Baseball color barrier in 1947, the Boston Red Sox (owned by avowed racist Tom Yawkey) didn’t add a player of color until 1959. That player’s name was Elijah “Pumpsie” Green.

Green was born October 27, 1933 in the small town of Boley, Oklahoma. As a youth, he excelled at sports, as did his brother Cornell, who wound up playing 13 seasons as a Defensive Back for the Dallas Cowboys. After playing college ball at Contra Costa, Pumpsie turned pro in 1954, and toiled in the minor leagues for five years before finally being called up by Boston. He made his Major League debut on July 21, 1959 as a pinch runner, and continued to play for the Sox, mostly as a second baseman, until being traded to the New York Mets for Felix Mantilla in 1963. Green played a few more seasons in the minors before hanging up his spikes in 1965. After his career ended, he worked as a high school baseball coach and truant officer in Berkeley, California, where he settled with his wife Marie.

His career stats aren’t exactly Hall of Fame material – a lifetime .246 average with 13 home runs and 74 RBI in just 344 games – but as the first black player for the Red Sox, he broke the ground for future stars like George “Boomer” Scott, Jim Rice, David Ortiz, Mookie Betts, and so many others. Elijah “Pumpsie” Green died today at the ripe old age 85. He may never be a Hall of Famer, but his contribution to the game of baseball was important, and his name will live on. Job well done, Pumpsie. Rest in peace.

Eat To The Beat(nik): Peter Falk in THE BLOODY BROOD (Kay Films 1959)

I suppose you could categorize THE BLOODY BROOD as Canadian Beatnik Noir – and it would definitely be a category of one! But this low-budget entry from The Great White North tells its tale at a fairly swift pace (or aboot as swift as those Canucks can get, eh?), features an oddball cast of characters, and offers viewers the unquestionably non-Canadian Peter Falk in his second film as a dope-peddling psychopath who gets his kicks from “death… the last great challenge of the collective mind”.

Falk, warming up for his breakthrough role as Abe ‘Kid Twist’ Reles in MURDER INC. a year later, plays Nico, who  pushes his junk to the Beat Generation rejects that hang around the local cafe (“He’s a salesman, baby… he sells dreams”). When an old man dies of a heart attack before their eyes, psycho Nico thinks it’d be far-out to deliberately off a square, so he and his pal Francis give a ground-glass-laced hamburger to an unsuspecting messenger boy. The kid calls his big brother Cliff right before he croaks, and now Cliff dives into the seedy world of bongos, bad poetry, and slinky chicks in leotards to avenge the boy, despite being warned off by Police Detective McLeod and copping a beating from a pair of Nico’s leather-clad thugs, Studs and The Weasel…

Falk steals the show as the cool-but-deadly Nico, giving us a mesmerizing portrayal of a sociopath. The film serves as a showcase for the then-32-year-old Falk’s undeniable talent, and his performance is worth the proverbial price of admission. As for the rest of the cast, none of them are anyone you’d immediately know, unless you’re a fan of Spaghetti Westerns – actor Jack Betts, who plays Our Hero Cliff, later changed his name to Hunt Powers and rode the dusty trail in Italian Horse Operas like SUGAR COLT, ONE DAMNED DAY AT DAWN… DJANGO MEETS SARTANA (as Django), DJANGO AND SARTANA ARE COMING… IT’S THE END (as Sartana!), COFFIN FULL OF DOLLARS, and A FISTFUL OF DEATH (and later portrayed Boris Karloff in the James Whale biopic GODS AND MONSTERS!).

All the usual beatnik trappings are to be found here in THE BLOODY BROOD, and director Julian Roffman manages to squeeze a decent little ‘B’ out of his rock-bottom budget limitations, aided by veteran DP Eugene Schufftan, the German immigrant who worked on everything from Fritz Lang’s METROPOLIS to Edgar G. Ulmer’s BLUEBEARD to Georges Franju’s EYES WITHOUT A FACE to his Oscar-winning work on Robert Rossen’s THE HUSTLER. There are four screenwriters credited, including Elwood Ullman . Wait, what? Ullman? Famous for scripting all those Three Stooges/Bowery Boys slapstick comedies? How’d he get in here? Maybe he took a side job while out on a caribou hunting trip, eh?

THE BLOODY BROOD is now available for viewing on The Film Detective

Royal Flush: THE CINCINNATI KID (MGM 1965)

There are movies about the high-stakes world of poker, and then there’s THE CINCINNATI KID. This gripping look at backroom gambling has long been a favorite of mine because of the high-powered all-star cast led by two acting icons from two separate generations – “The Epitome of Cool” Steve McQueen and “Original Gangster” Edward G. Robinson . The film was a breakthrough for director Norman Jewison, who went after this from lightweight fluff like 40 POUNDS OF TROUBLE and SEND ME NO FLOWERS to weightier material like IN THE HEAT OF THE NIGHT and THE THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR.

The film revolves around a poker showdown between up and coming young stud Eric Stoner, known as The Kid, and veteran Lancey Howard, venerated in card playing circles as The Man. This theme of young tyro vs old pro wasn’t exactly groundbreaking, having been hashed and rehashed in countless Westerns over the years, but screenwriters Terry Southern and Ring Lardner Jr’s changing the setting from a dusty cowtown to a five-card stud table for that inevitable showdown makes all the difference.

THE PLAYERS

Steve McQueen as The Kid

McQueen was at the top of his game after starring in hits like THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN and THE GREAT ESCAPE, and his intense underplaying as The Kid captures the zeitgeist of mid-60’s cool like no other.

Edward G. Robinson as Lancey, “The Man”

Eddie G. had burst into screen history as bombastic Rico Bandello in LITTLE CAESAR 35 years earlier, but his performance here is both shaded and subtle. Robinson SHOULD’VE won the Best Supporting Actor Oscar, but wasn’t even nominated – Yet Another Oscar Crime (in my humble opinion)!

Ann-Margret  as Melba

For my money, nobody did onscreen sluttiness  better than Annie, and here she’s at her steamy best as trampy Melba, wife of game dealer Shooter.

Karl Malden  as Shooter

Malden excels as the cuckolded, compromised dealer, saddled with both a loveless marriage to Melba and huge debts to rich gambler Slade. Like Robinson, Malden should have been at least considered for an Oscar nom.

Tuesday Weld  as Christian

The criminally underrated Miss Weld turns in a fine performance as The Kid’s sweet but slightly dimwitted girl Christian. Tuesday had previously costarred opposite McQueen in SOLDIER IN THE RAIN, and the pair work well together.

Joan Blondell  as Lady Fingers

Another 30’s icon, Our Girl Joanie is at her best as the boisterous, been-there-done-that relief dealer Lady Fingers. Blondell and Robinson were reunited here for the first time since 1936’s BULLETS OR BALLOTS, and watching these two old pros together again is a joy!

Rip Torn  as Slade

The late, great Rip Torn, who passed away a few short days ago at age 88, plays Slade, the bad guy of the piece. He’s the embodiment of Southern decadence, and is always worth watching (for more Rip Torn performances, watch his Judas Iscariot in KING OF KINGS, writer Henry Miller in TROPIC OF CANCER, country singer Maury Dann in PAYDAY, and of course Zed in the MEN IN BLACK movies. Rest in peace, Rip).

Jack Weston as Pig

Weston doesn’t get much attention these days, but this marvelous character actor graced us in movies ranging from THE INCREDIBLE MR. LIMPET to WAIT UNTIL DARK, CACTUS FLOWER to GATOR, HIGH ROAD TO CHINA to DIRTY DANCING. His role is small here, but Weston always manages to shine.

Cab Calloway as Yeller

Like Weston, Calloway’s part is small, but without the “Hi-De-Ho” Man, THE CINCINNATI KID just wouldn’t have been the same. Calloway hadn’t been on American screens since 1958’s ST. LOUIS BLUES, and it’s always a treat to see him again.

Add to that list a plethora of Familiar Faces, including Jeff Corey , Robert DoQui, Theo Marcuse, Burt Mustin, Milton Selzer, Ron Soble, Karl Swenson, Dub Taylor , Irene Tedrow (as Tuesday’s mom), Charles Wagenheim , and Midge Ware, and you’ve got a Master Class of screen acting going on (and a special shout-out goes to young Ken Grant as the nickle-pitching shoeshine boy). Lalo Schifrin provides the jazzy score, DP Philip Lathrop’s shot composition is perfectly framed, and future director Hal Ashby adds some stunning editing work. THE CINCINNATI KID is a real treat for film buffs, one I’ve seen many times over, and surely will again.

All Star Exploitation: MACHETE MAIDENS UNLEASHED (Australian 2010)

Tonight we celebrate baseball with MLB’s 90th annual All-Star Game, and… what’s that you say, Dear Readers? You don’t LIKE baseball?!? (*sighs, shakes head, mutters “must be some kinda Commies”*) Luckily for you, I’ve got an alternative for your viewing pleasure this evening. It’s an All-Star salute to the halcyon days of low-budget Exploitation filmmaking in the Philippines that lasted roughly from 1959 (Gerry DeLeon’s TERROR IS A MAN, with Francis Lederer and Greta Thyssen) to the early 80’s and the advent both of VHS, which effectively ended the Drive-In/Grindhouse Era, and political upheaval caused in part by Fernando Marcos’s imposition of martial law on the island nation.

1971’s “Beast of the Yellow Night”

This Australian-made documentary by writer/director Mark Hartley covers the wild, wild world of making Exploitation movies in the jungle on a shoestring budget through judicious use of clips, trailers, and interviews with the people who made these crazy things – and lived to tell about it! And you want non-baseball All-Stars? Let’s start with the King of the ‘B’s’ himself, Roger Corman, whose New World Pictures produced, financed (minimally, I might add!), and released many of them stateside, beginning with 1971’s BEAST OF THE YELLOW NIGHT and ending with 1979’s JAWS -ripoff UP FROM THE DEEP. Rapid Roger makes no bones about the fact these little epics were green lit strictly to make money – and boy, did they ever!

Pam Grier and Margaret Markov in “Black Mama White Mama” (1973)

Among the many interviewees are directors Allan Arkush, Joe Dante, Jack Hill, Jonathan Kaplan , and John Landis , Corman graduates all. Landis is particularly candid and hilarious in his assessment of pretentious, eggheaded critics who saw more into these schlockfests than was intended. Like Corman, he fully admits the only reason they were made was a quick buck! Also on hand are rare interviews with legendary Filipino directors Eddie Romero (MAD DOCTOR OF BLOOD ISLAND, BLACK MAMA WHITE MAMA , THE TWILIGHT PEOPLE) and Cirio Santiago (TNT JACKSON, THE MUTHERS , VAMPIRE HOOKERS).

Pam again, with Sid Haig in “The Big Doll House” (1971)

And talk about All-Stars? How’s this for a power-hitting lineup: Colleen Camp (EBONY, IVORY, & JADE), Marlene Clark (NIGHT OF THE COBRA WOMAN), Pam Grier (THE BIG DOLL HOUSE), Gloria Hendry (SAVAGE SISTERS), Dick Miller (FLY ME), Chris Mitchum (THE ONE-ARMED EXECUTIONER), Patrick Wayne (BEYOND ATLANTIS), and Celeste Yarnell (BEAST OF BLOOD) all appear in interview segments. Not only that, but the great Sid Haig , who costarred in just about ALL of these films (many times opposite Grier), shares his own reminiscences about the glory days of Filipino filmmaking.

James Bond Jr?: Weng Weng in “For Y’ur Height Only” (1981)

There’s loads of clips and trailers from classic trash like THE BIG BIRD CAGE, COVER GIRL MODELS (“They’re always overexposed but they’re never underdeveloped!”), DYNAMITE JOHNSON, FIRECRACKER, THE HOT BOX (“Their guns are hot and their bodies are hard!”), THEY CALL HER CLEOPATRA WONG, WOMEN IN CAGES, and FOR Y’UR HEIGHT ONLY, starring the immortal 2’9″ Filipino superstar Weng Weng! It’s all here in MACHETE MAIDENS UNLEASHED: mad monsters, women in chains, action, explosions, and most importantly, The 3 B’s – Beasts, Blood, and Breasts! They just don’t make ’em like these flicks anymore, and probably never will again. This is one hell of a fun documentary that Grindhouse/Exploitation/Drive-In fans won’t want to miss! Now excuse me while I go watch some baseball.

from Eddie Romero’s “The Twilight People” (1972)

Drive-In Saturday Night 4: WHITE LINE FEVER (Columbia 1975) & HIGH-BALLIN’ (AIP 1978)

via Drive-In Saturday Night 4: WHITE LINE FEVER (Columbia 1975) & HIGH-BALLIN’ (AIP 1978)

One Hit Wonders #27: “Wipeout” by The Surfaris (Dot Records 1963)

Kids all across America pounded their school desk tops in the 60’s and 70’s  (and probably still do!) imitating the hard-drivin’ primal drum solo of The Surfari’s “Wipeout”, which shot to #2 in the summer of 1963:

Ron Wilson based his riff on a simple paradiddle, a practice piece most anyone could do. Hell, even I can do a paradiddle, and I have NO musical talent whatsoever (as my good-ole-southern-boy dad used to say, “Son, you couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket!”). Only Wilson sped things up a few notches, aided by the twin guitar attack of Bob Berryhill and Jim Fuller, and Pat Connolly’s bubbling-under bass line holding the whole thing down.

At age 19, Wilson was the old man of The Surfaris – everyone else was sixteen years old when the song was recorded! “Wipeout” was first released locally in sunny Southern California as the ‘B’ side to their Beach Boys/Dick Dale inspired “Surfer Joe”, but then radio listeners started requesting the record’s flip side, and the band had an unintentional hit on their hands. Dot Records picked it up for national distribution, and “Wipeout” became a surprise smash! The song was re-released several times, charting again in 1966 and 1970, and  has been used on countless film soundtracks, including THE HOLLYWOOD KNIGHTS, THE SANDLOT, WAYNE’S WORLD 2, TOY STORY 2, and DIRTY DANCING:

Rumors that future shock-talk TV host Morton Downey Jr. had a hand in writing and producing the song are completely untrue – “Wipeout” is a pure product of four Southern California kid’s imagination, and one of the biggest All-American rock’n’roll hits of all time! Have a Safe and Happy 4th of July, everyone – surf’s up!

Cowabunga!!